M is for Monica. i'm a full time commerce student @ UWA. i turn one year older on the 14th Oct. i ♥ Jesus and not afraid to tell the world. i want to do YWAM and missions in the future. i love heights - planes, skyscrapers, mountains, cliffs, you name it. One day i hope to go bungee jumping and sky diving. i was born in China but have lived in Australia most of my life. Having said that, i'm still quite chinese lol. i like pink things, ribbons, bows, hearts, hello kitty, ruffles, lace, florals. i have a shoe fetish. i wouldn't call myself a shopaholic, although most of my friends would say otherwise. People often see me as strong, independent, ambitious. i thank God for the past 21 years that i've been alive. He has been ever faithful, gracious and loving.



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>Your grace has found me just as i am, empty handed but alive in Your hands
>i called, You answered, i wanna be where You are
>i am a flower quickly fading, here today and gone tomorrow, a wave tossed in the ocean, vapour in the wind. still You hear me when i call out, Lord you catch me when i'm falling and you tell me who i am, i am Yours
>Broken hearts become brand new, that's what faith can do
>A thousand times i've failed, still Your mercy remains. And should i stumble again, still i'm caught in Your grace.
>My heart will sing, no other name, Jesus.
>If i had wings i would fly, coz all that i am, You are. If the world caved in around me, to You i'd still hold on.
>Your light will shine when all else fades
>i'm running to Your arms, i'm running to Your arms. The riches of Your love will always be enough.
>我们不是你和我
>活在第一次的见面里
>只要你一个眼神肯定，我的爱就有意义
>爱转角遇见了谁，是否有爱情的美。爱转角以后的街，能不能有我来陪。
>自由再被绑架之前，我决定过瘾的享受孤单。
>笑着面对每个阻碍，不轻易说离开
>我还记得你笑的像孩子一样
>离开我，你会不会好一点?
>幸福的开始就是放手去爱
>心碎了一地，捡不回从前的心跳
>我会学着放弃你，是因为我太爱你
>you're the only one whose got enough of me to break my heart
>you're the only one i've loved enough to not forget
>Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? i could really use a wish right now
>you're the best thing that's ever been mine
>In a storm, in my best dress, fearless.
>If you're my dream please come true

It's past 11pm and i'm contemplating whether or not to apply for vacation work at all. Well honestly one reason is because i am completely buggered and it's late and i'm tired. Another reason is i seriously do not want to be an accountant. This semester i'm doing an auditing unit and all i can say is, it sucks. i've always found a conflict between the things that i like and the things that i'm good at. For example, in high school i really liked Physics, believe it or not. It's the only TEE science i did. However i wasn't particularly good at it. Accounting is another one. i've never been too bad at accounting; ok to be frank, it's my highest scoring unit/s and also ones which i put in the least effort and time. you'd be surprised how many accounting tutorials i've actually attended these 2.5yrs at uni (close to none because most of them aren't compulsory lol).

you might argue that it doesn't hurt to apply. If i get it, that means God wants me to do this. If not, oh well *shrugs*. But in actual fact, it's the interview that scares me. i don't want to go through that 2 hour long interview again /: i mean, who likes interviews?

All of this just feels so insignificant. i know i say i want to go on mission to China, long term even. But i actually don't know how i'm going to go about that. Everything is easier said than done. The current plan is a postgrad in education after my commerce degree. Considering YWAM after that. But i know my plans will fail badly if God isn't in it all. Still seeking His will everyday.

i've always felt that i'm not meant to stay in Perth for the rest of my life. i'm someone that can leave everything behind and start off new (lol i know i've said this many times before). There's actually alot of things i wanna do in life - travel the world, go on mission, own a fashion store, bungee jumping, sky diving - to name a few. And it's funny coz these things don't include getting married, settling down, having kids. Ok, i think weddings are pretty nice, and i'd like to have one, but only because i'll get to wear a beautiful gown lol! On the other hand, i've realised how hard it is to go on mission (or just a foreign environment) by yourself. i've come to realise how important it is to have spiritual support. Ahhh the contradiction lol.

It's ok, for God has a plan for my life (:

i digress, for today, i have just bookmarked the vacation work application pages. Will get back to them another day, i promise.